Mailing Everyone on MySpace a LiTtLe BrOwN HaNdBoOk

You know....this MySpace thing that's happening is kinda funny. I mean, the human being is now mutating into a species that is so good at lying to himself, that he actually believes some of the crap he says in these self-written pages. For example, the concept of having 5,762 "friends"...hilarious, especially for people that barely leave their computer screens to wipe properly or take a shower. (oh, please, I've seen you...it's true...)They have no friends at school or work, but they have GAZILLIONS of friends on MySpace.
Then, the proper-English-Nazi comes flying out of me! Lordy, Lordy. Number 1, the spelling....oh...I almost have no words, but good gracious...when they are misspelling their own descriptors...i.e. "I'm a hiper leo that loves animels, and dancing, and hanging out with my freinds! Thay are So CoOl!" OR "If U R as hot as I am, you mite get to be one of my friends!" Mite? I think the word she's looking for is "crabs". Number 2. This lack of capitals or over-use of capitals makes me nutty...what the heck with that, coupled with no punctuation! I'm sorry for sounding like a big fat girdle hoisting granny, but reading some of this crap is like trying a decode a note written by a first-grader...and I know that from experience.
I had a composition teacher in high school named Mr. Nyberg, God rest his tired old soul. The man was 6 ft. 5 in., and easily 400 pounds, and scared the poo-pie out of me! He was an absolute tyrant about the English language.... we would dissect gerund phrases and dangling participles all day and when your 15 and think you don't need that stuff...well, let's just say I spent a good amount of time rolling my eyes. He treated the Little Brown Handbook (A commonly used grammar book that's probably hit its 800th edition by now) like the Bible. We were also expected to write a 40-page paper, which included 4 chapters, footnotes, 10 sources and 2 interviews. Do high school teachers even do that anymore?!? Now I'm forever grateful to Master Nyberg for placing an amazing amount of aptitude and appreciation in me...and a craving to write what I think...but communicate it in a way that doesn't make me look like a low-brained mouth-breather.
My husband just pointed out that I am a big lamer for having run-on sentences......I shall now step away from my grammar soapbox.
Anyway, thank you letting me mentally vomit in your lap, friends. Until another day...